i jhust puked up my retainher.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
