Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Randomize