wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Randomize
