They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Dignity is for republicans.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
