We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
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