Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
