I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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