we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize
