whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
