I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
