do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize