So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
