he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
