Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
