meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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