Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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