Buhtt sex?
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
