We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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