SEEEEXXX PLEASE
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
