Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I wear drunk well.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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