Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
