yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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