that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
