found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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