he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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