I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I currently don't understand fingers.
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