R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
