South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
