Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
