What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
