sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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