Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
