i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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