I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
