she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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