White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
