Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
