I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize