is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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