Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Randomize
