Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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