on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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