Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
