just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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