so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
