Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
this beer tastes like vomit already
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
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