Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Operation Purity has been aborted
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
