i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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