i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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