Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I wish they made helmets for livers.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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