He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize