Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
